perjantai 24. toukokuuta 2013

tunnelvision

As clock striked the middle of the day she fumbled out of the jumbled forest of sleep in to the waking world. Grey light trickled in through curtains too scant for the wide window to the outside world. She burrowed tighter into the blankets, warm with her own bodyheat and a calming presence against naked skin in a world where such trivialities as temperature were not to be trifled with by mere mortals.

Cocooned in the bed, head thick with sleep she opened her eyes to stare at nothing in particular. It was in this part of the awakening that the dreams from night previous were still close, almost tangible like memories from a week away. Sometimes it was too much to remember the beauty, the grandeur and sense of belonging she experienced only in her sleep, but today the memory lingering was too strong to forget. It was simple enough to explain, but so breathtaking in it's clarity that none could understand but herself, having experienced it. When recalling the dream to her friends, she might tell them of glass castle, the garden where a wedding was to be held, the cabin grown inside a tree, still changing and growing by the minute as you walked from room to room, but the most important thing she would leave out. It was the love she could not explain.

In the dream she was to be wed soon, to a person not quite anyone in particular, not a man or a woman, not even a face or a name that would stay for more than a fleeting moment. Yet when she had sat down next to her future spouse, leaning on her left elbow on the growing oak table. She had said nothing but listened to the other talking about something that needed to be done and sudddenly there had been nothing expect the other person. She had observed them kind, thoughtful and clever and thought of how these qualities, maybe ordinary in name but not in them, were things that she knew she would love always in them. Upon that simple enough realization there was a pulsing, all consuming, wildfire like feeling of love that left her warm yet reeling under the intesity.

In the waking world she remembered how it was to love like that. How everything was so simple, even when living made it complicated. Her chest hurt and ached at the loss of love that had never existed to anyone else but her, that could not survive sunlight.

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Whisper your message to the waves, the echo will reach me.